The first time you have in-laws, or any extended family for that matter, is a pretty big deal. After all, you’re entering a new phase of your life – one that will hopefully be full of love and laughter. How do you prepare? Start planning social gatherings as early as possible to ensure everything runs smoothly on the day.
Make sure everyone knows what to expect and what’s expected of them. Be honest, open, and direct with your answers when asked about anything from marriage laws to religious customs. Don’t avoid questions – just don’t answer directly if it feels uncomfortable or awkward for you or others in the conversation.
On top of that, it can feel like a particularly overwhelming introduction with so many different people coming together at once. If you aren’t already used to meeting new people and their families, this will be even more difficult than usual. Here are some suggestions on how to make the most of your first experience:
It’s a good idea to spend time thinking about what you’ll say and do when you meet your in-laws for the first time. Write down some ideas for things you’d like to say and do, so you aren’t left scrambling when your loved ones arrive unexpectedly.
It’s also a good idea to talk to your partner about what you’d like from your new family members. Some people find it helpful to ask their partner to remind them to be respectful and kind as they meet in-laws. There are also some practical things you can do to make the occasion run more smoothly.
For example, ensure your in-laws know what time you’ll be arriving, where you’ll be staying, and any dietary requirements they’re likely to have. You can also try to arrange a few “stay at home” days with your partner so you can get to know each other without your in-laws around.
Get to know your in-laws already
Most people know that you’re supposed to get to know your in-laws before the big day, but many people don’t follow through with that plan. Chatting with a family member or two about your new relatives will help you get to know them better.
If you have access to Skype or another online program, try scheduling a call with your in-laws so you can see and talk with them face-to-face. You can also ask your relatives for help with this process – after all, they’re probably happy for you to get to know their new family members. Make sure you ask how you can get to know your in-laws better.
You can also ask your relatives to help you with the invitation process. They may know which family members are most welcoming and willing to meet, or they may know how to help you make the most of limited visits.
Have some alone time before the big day
If you feel like you’re getting stressed out and overwhelmed before the big day, try taking some time to relax. Take a break from social events and avoid any other activities that will make you feel too rushed or rushed.
You might also consider talking to someone who you trust about how you’re feeling – a family member, friend, or doctor might be able to help. A little time to yourself will help you calm down and avoid any potential social problems.
Don’t forget to have fun!
If you’re lucky enough to have in-laws who are fun and open-minded, make sure you enjoy yourself. You may be nervous, but don’t forget to have fun and try not to let those nerves take over. If you’re with in-laws who are too serious or judgmental about your choices, it may make you feel anxious about showing your true self.
It’s important to remember no matter what, you’re allowed to have fun. You can choose what you do and who you hang out with while you’re with your in-laws. Try to avoid heavy topics of conversation when you’re trying to have fun. No need to discuss your marriage plans or how you met; instead, find topics of conversation that are lighter or allow you to have fun.
Remember, it’s a long journey and there’ll be bumps along the way.
This sounds like it may be a negative statement, but it isn’t! You’re embarking on a journey filled with new experiences and challenges. You’re going to learn a lot, and some of those lessons are likely to be hard and painful. Make sure you don’t bottle up your feelings about things, though.
Talking about them with a close friend or family member can help you process your feelings and deal with them more constructively. It’s also important to remember that even though you’re meeting in-laws for the first time, this is a lifelong journey. You’re going to grow closer and learn more about each other every day.
Take care of yourself
Finally, make sure you take care of yourself as best you can. You might find yourself getting stressed out about meeting your in-laws, especially if you’re feeling uncomfortable about certain aspects of the situation. Take some time to relax and process your feelings – you’ll be better able to deal with any problems that arise if you’re not worried about them.
You might also find it helpful to talk to a trusted friend or family member about any underlying issues you’re facing. Hiding issues and feeling anxious about them can make things seem much more difficult than they are.
It can also be really helpful to talk to someone who knows you well and can help you see things from a different perspective. This can help you move past any issues you might be having and make sure you’re feeling ready for the day ahead.
Remember, meeting your in-laws is a big deal, but it doesn’t have to be difficult or awkward. Take some of these suggestions and apply them to your social calendar, and you’ll end up having a lot of fun – and making some great memories. You’ll likely meet a lot of new people when you have in-laws, so make the most of your time by getting to know them well.
Be open and friendly, and don’t hesitate to ask people for help when you need it. Finally, don’t forget to take care of yourself, whatever you might be feeling. This will help you relax and enjoy your time with in-laws, even when things get a little hectic.