Everyone knows someone who is toxic. They’re that annoying friend who constantly complains about how bad everything is and refuses to see the positivity in any situation. They’re that one work colleague whose negativity is so contagious that it makes everyone around them depressed. And they’re that person you meet on dating sites who seem nice at first, but before you know it, they’re draining your energy and leaving you feeling like crap every time they come around. These people can be hard to spot because they hide their toxicity very well. After all, everyone has their moments where life seems overwhelming or disappointing, and that’s when a few of us tend to get negative and jaded about everything. However, if you spend a lot of time with these people, then chances are that you should probably look for ways to move on from them instead of trying to work through things with them again. Here are some signs that your partner might be toxic:
They constantly complain and complain and complain
This is a red flag. If your partner complains about everything and anything, then you should probably find a new partner because complaining is not the way to deal with problems. These complaints are usually about things that are out of your partner’s control, like work or other people, so they’re just venting. Instead of listening to their feelings and problems and trying to help them find solutions, you’re just hearing about how bad everything is. And it’s not just about the things that are going wrong in their life; it could also be something as simple as not getting their way or being hurt when someone doesn’t respond to them in a certain way. If they don’t understand why it matters to them, then they shouldn’t be complaining, they should just let it go.
They’re only interested in being your friend when you can talk about their problems
This is a really toxic trait. You should want to be friends with anyone, not just your close friends. And if they’re only interested in how you feel, not in you, then you should probably distance yourself from them for a while. It doesn’t matter how much you love someone, you have to have some space in your life. And if your partner wants to be friends with you only when you’re talking about their problems, then that’s a serious sign that they’re not ready to be in a relationship with someone. So, if they can’t even be your friend when you’re not discussing their problems, then you need to take time to figure out if you’re ready for a serious relationship.
They have nothing nice to say about anyone or anything
This is a really bad sign. If they can’t bring themselves to be nice to anyone, then they’re probably not ready to be in a relationship with anyone. Their niceness is very important and not just when they’re in a relationship; it’s also important when they’re in every other type of social interaction. If they can’t even be nice to strangers or friends when they don’t want to talk about their problems, then they shouldn’t be in a relationship with someone. You need to be able to be nice to everyone, even if you don’t like them. And if your partner can’t be nice to you or others when they don’t have to, then you need to distance yourself from them.
They constantly try to control you and make decisions for you
If someone constantly tries to control you or make decisions for you, then you should distance yourself from them because this is a very toxic sign. If you have an authority figure in your life, like your parents, your teachers, or a coach, then you should probably distance yourself from them because they could be toxic. But if you don’t have anyone in those roles who is trying to control you or make decisions for you, then you need to figure out why they would even want to control you and make decisions for you. Someone who constantly tries to control you or make decisions for you is usually insecure or jealous and insecure of your relationship with other people. If you try to control them back, you might end up offending them, which could be a sign that you need to distance yourself from them.
They’re jealous, insecure, and insecure of you being around other people
If they’re jealous, insecure, and insecure of your relationship with other people, then this is a serious sign that you need to distance yourself from them. People who are jealous or insecure usually aren’t ready for a relationship; they only want one-sided connections where they feel loved and important. And if you happen to be the one who makes them feel that way, then you need to take time to figure out why.
They devalue your opinions and feelings
If your partner devalues your opinions and feelings, then you need to distance yourself from them because this is a very toxic sign. Yes, you need to care about their feelings, but you also need to remember that you’re in this relationship too. You need to care about your feelings and your needs, not just yours. If your partner tries to make you feel bad for having your own needs or wants, then you need to take a step back and figure out if they’re worth keeping in your life.
They’re insensitive to your emotional needs
If they’re insensitive to your emotional needs, then you need to distance yourself from them because this is a serious sign that they don’t respect you. When someone respects you, they give you credit for your feelings and thoughts, and they don’t try to make you feel bad for having them. Someone who is insensitive usually only respects their own feelings and thoughts, and they don’t respect yours. So, if they don’t respect your feelings or opinions, then you need to distance yourself from them.
They don’t acknowledge the effort you put into a relationship. You’re just “a good girlfriend/boyfriend” until they get bored.
This is a serious red flag, and it usually happens when someone is toxic. If someone constantly tells you that you’re “just a girlfriend/boyfriend,” then you need to distance yourself from them because you deserve better. You’re worth more than that, and you’re worth so much more than someone who constantly belittles you and makes you feel like you’re not worth anything. As you can see, there are a lot of signs that your partner might be toxic. However, if you spend enough time with them, you’re bound to see them in one of these signs. So, if you see any of these signs in your partner, try to get away from them because they need to work on themselves and not you.